UNSOLICITED CRUSH

‘I was just thinking about you,

Wondering if you are still wearing the same cologne,

Smell good on you,

You have that masculine,

Shoulders,

Back straight,

You really impressed me’

The immortal words of Jill Scott in her neo-soul single cross my mind. Typical, mental reflection of a woman having a crush.

First time I met him, I suddenly felt the need for the re-definition of a crush.

OXFORD ENGLISH DICTIONARY-2informal A brief but intense infatuation for someone, especially someone unattainable:

It was an electrifying, magnetic, sensual and gravitating feeling, so profound and not by any means inappropriate. You can’t choose whom to have alluring feeling towards. The heart is the most resolute part of human mental anatomy. When she demands that you get infatuated with someone, then so it will be. To hell with the believers of ‘you choose what you feel’. The feeling of liking is like a dove finding its release from a cage. You cannot hold it back when it wants out.

I had never glared at someone that endlessly in my life. He was average height, with an even chocolate skin complexion. His eyes had a milky white dominance with a light shade of brown, his body perfectly structured with his shoulders wide enough to hold the fairly muscled chest and his dentition perfectly white and neatly arranged. This was first degree torture. I could hardly pay attention to even an annoying buzzing fly.

Worse still, his dressing was mind-blowing, my style. The fitting pair of blue jeans held on to his limbs as though he was created in them. To create a perfect blend was a long sleeved white and navy blue striped shirt neatly folded to his elbows. Down to his feet was nice pair of black spot on loafers and finally to add the cherry on top was designer leather watch.

From where I stood, I could feel his divine scent, escorting me away to state of trance. Who are you? Could you by any chance be from another planet? Can I hear your voice? Do you know I am smitten by you? I couldn't help but think of a myriad of questions I would ask him given a chance.

Thank God he was going to the 22^nd floor. I on the other hand was visiting the 7^th floor. Now I know you’re thinking ‘please don’t confess you followed him up to his destination floor!’ Well, too late, I think I already did. The elevator was filled with four other people but that’s all I remember. Four people whom I don’t even recall their gender or what they looked like. Selective invisibility was indeed at its best. Who cared if I got late to go print some God forsaken document? This was not an opportunity I was going to screw up or the least miss out on the experience of relishing human art at its finest.

Seconds later his phone rang and he waits for some time before picking it up .In this moment I literally crossed my fingers and hoped he had a terrible voice that would put me off so that I could stop acting like a walking zombie. But I was wrong. ‘Damn it!’ my mind was blown off. His voice was deep, appealing, softly hoarse and guttural sending chills down my spine. It almost felt like he was whispering behind my ear. As if I had not suffered enough mental paralysis, he let out a warm chuckle that got me smiling. ’Just why was he doing this to me ‘my inner voice mumbled.

As he spoke on his phone, my eyes noticed his fingernails neatly cut and well-shaped. The fingers were average length in compatibility with his body size and not too slim or chunky. Just perfect!

This whole time I was staring never did he throw a glance at me (Totally devastating). Unrecognisable I was to him. He probably didn't even notice I was in the elevator or in existence unlike me who was already a fool for his anaesthetized outlook.

‘A crush is the most devastating yet exciting emotion ever unearthed’ my mind thought. The mystery aspect is the most exciting part of it all. If everyone you had a crush on spoke to you, the thrill would be irrelevant and meek.

After the protracted trip to the 22^nd floor, guess who he met up with…his wife and child. One word to nature. ‘Depressing!’ Did  you have to bust my bubble like that? Nature! Here is a message to you. ‘You could use a chill pill. It’s never killed anyone.’ At least I can attest to that. I honestly didn't deserve that. I was going through enough emotional trauma staring at someone who thought I was invincible.

Well, to cut my extensive sob story short, I pretended to be doing a lot of nothing at the 22^nd floor just to look like I had a sense of focus. A while later I took the elevator and eventually went to 7^th  floor feeling cursed. It seems like the dictionary is right after all, this time borrowing form the google dictionary;

informal

a brief but intense infatuation for someone, especially someone unattainable or inappropriate.

"she did have a crush on Dr. Russell"

synonyms:

infatuation, obsession, love, passion;  informal puppy love "a teenage crush"

‘especially someone very unattainable’